Spring is here...tomorrow!

Hey all!
I just thought I'd check in with you and see how you all are doing! We are doing good. Still have our moments but as they say...time heals. Although sometimes I wonder if there is enough time in the world to completely heal you...and I've come to the conclusion that there probably isn't. Thank goodness there is life after death in Heaven and when we get there we will be completely healed of all our sadness and all our illnesses that we had in this world! And we can then lead a completely sad free life! But speaking of time can you believe that we are almost to spring? Tomorrow is the day! I don't know about where all you live but the weather here has gotten a lot nicer this past week and so I am just itching for all those nice spring days! I already am looking forward to getting out in the dirt and planting some new flowers. For those of you who know me, you know that I am not a gardener or anything but last year after Emmalee died I planted a wagon of flowers as her garden and I did really fall in love with it! And I can't believe it actually survived all summer. So Jon, who has wanted me to be more "outdoorsy", jumped at the chance and had me planting flowers all over the yard so I would have something to take care of outside and spend more time with him out there. So, I guess Emmalee changed her mama! Anyway, I have found something new that triggers sadness for me this last week. I have started making appointments in to May and June. It was really hard to write that first appointment, since I wasn't planning on working for those months, and actually the whole summer to be honest. I was really going to try to get to May and then take it easy and enjoy (or try to enjoy) those last few weeks. So making appointments in those months have been a little hard...plus on my calendar I have written out the weeks I would have been, I already had them written out, so there they are reminding me of what should/could have been. And I figure it doesn't do any good to erase them because it will still be there...just more faint. These months will be hard...I knew that. I think it will really get easier after June. A little more closure. But for now these babes weren't suppose to be here yet and while we are healing very well, I think it will be good to get past June. But it's also really hard because a lot, and I mean a lot, of my friends are pregnant and every time someone else tells us they are expecting it stings a little. We are so happy for them, we really are, but it's just a reminder of what we don't have. And what we won't have for a while yet. Sorry...I don't mean to get off on a pity party for Jon and Ali...'cause it's really not about that. Just writing what's on my mind I guess. Thanks for keeping us in your prayers. We really appreciate it! And God is writing a story here in our lives and that is exciting so I am just looking forward to all the new chapters. There will be happy ones to come. I am sure of it! Well...here's to spring everyone and the new life that comes with it! Let's go enjoy it!